Glastonbury glamping has nothing on my Duster

The first job is to make the bed, so to speak. I did carry out a small trial at home to make sure it was working. It all made sense, but my lasting impression was that this was going to be a bit of aggro.

And so it proves. First, lower the rear seats flat and push the front seats as far forwards as they go. Next, pull out the wooden bed base, which is heavier than it looks – mind your fingers, like I didn’t – and clip it into place. Fold out the mattress, add some extra side cushions (to stop you falling into the footwell), attach the window blackouts, which magically snap into place, and… done. This time it was all rather painless – bar the finger.

Now, the tent. Anyone who has put up a tent before knows it’s never easy, but having pulled the Sleep Pack’s synthetic canvas house out of the bag, I can tell this is going to be a different level of misery.

Never mind pinning down four corners and popping it up into place; instead, one of the tent’s sides connects to the Dacia’s open boot, and I find out quickly why this is an issue: the open side means the wind can get in, and the wind getting in means the tent keeps trying to fly away, which then pulls out the pegs that are already (not) pinning it all down. Lord have mercy…

At this point I realise my campsite neighbours have formed a small crowd and are staring at me, wondering what on earth is going on. “It’s the future,” I preach to one. He’s not buying it. They definitely think I’m mad.